You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
