I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
