I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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