your room smells of hookers.
And success
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize