I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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