Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize