margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
