Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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