He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
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He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
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Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men