my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
handjob tips. give me some.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
My bed smells like the plague