We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
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Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!