On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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