i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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