Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
