She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
