i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
