Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
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I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
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Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
We need to get me chipped asap
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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