Porn is love you can see.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
