'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
