So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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