First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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