if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
