sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.