I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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