remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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