I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
