My balls are so social today.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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