i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
