she woke up with a sticky ear
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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