If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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