Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
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Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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