Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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