So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
