me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
