Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
