I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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