I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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