what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
