I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize