Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize