Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
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