He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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