I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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