Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize