i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Randomize
