I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
