we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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