Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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