I just cut my nipple shaving
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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