is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize