you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize