Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Even the bartender felt bad for me
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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