walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
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