come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
